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I am Gerudo

She’s a proud-nosed warrior with massive thighs that’ll pulverise a man’s pelvis should she choose to make him her voe. Sure, he will never walk again but what the hell… life’s too short to worry about piffling little details like that! He could always hitch himself a sand seal ride should he find the need to venture beyond the bedroom!

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osmose

i’m walking around in that same old rain
each tired drop splats a fresh cliché
i’ve been so scared for the longest time
but, really, can i shrink any more?
when i’m hung out to dry, how small will i be?

isn’t this all just a bad dream?
this can’t be the world we live in
breathe it in, boy, the sun at your back
sun kisses, you fool, sun kisses for you
the sun kisses her shoulders too

i’m a stranger burning beneath a fake sky
where there’s smoke there’s chimneys
she’s got a severe case of the chiminy changas
and i’m not supposed to notice that, but…
so help me, i do

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